Rakhi…. !

For the benefit of those who are not totally sure about this festival , its really quite simple – It celebrates a bond between brothers and sister’s. The latter ties what is essentially a wristband of sorts on to the brother , who in return is expected to “protect” the sister(s) from any harm , and also give gifts to the sisters in return for this band. The gifts can be anything but cash seems to be favorite.

Sisters can be siblings, cousins or even friends who are women. The festival, at least , during my college days was a good chance for young girls to fend off advances by the boys by tying them a Rakhi – that way they technically became his sister and hence any advances would be incestuous. Needless to say there was a cloud of depression over a lot of people , and more often that not you would see a guy running a break neck speed in order to avoid this from happening.

It become big business as well. Step out 2-3 days before the day and most shops would have constructed large displays of Rakhi’s. The Rakhi’s themselves have evolved from simple , colorful bands to hideous designs which include, spider man , Potter , Krrish , Bollywood faces etc. A very ghastly thought , a nightmare if you end up getting one and needing to wear it the entire day.

The good news is that i get a day off from office. The bad news is i have 4 cousin sisters , i still have not thought of what i am going to give, but with 4 sisters i can expect a horrific drop in the weight of my wallet!

Grammatical Versatility of Fuck

I heard the original on Audio , forgotten the guy but it gets me every time!

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Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language today is the word “fuck.” It is the one magical word which, just by its sound, can describe pain, pleasure, love and hate. In language, “fuck” falls into many grammatical categories.

It can be used as a verb, both transitive (John fucked Mary) and intransitive (Mary was fucked by John). It can be an action verb (John really gives a fuck), a passive verb (Mary really doesn’t give a fuck), an adverb (Mary is fucking interested in John), or as a noun (Mary is a terrific fuck). It can also be used as an adjective (Mary is fucking beautiful) or an interjection (Fuck! I’m late for my date with Mary). It can even be used as a conjunction (Mary is easy, fuck she’s also stupid).

As you can see, there are very few words with the overall versatility of the word “fuck”. Aside from its sexual connotations, this incredible word can be used to describe many situations:

1. Greetings “How the fuck are ya?”
2. Fraud “I got fucked by the car dealer.”
3. Resignation “Oh, fuck it!”
4. Trouble “I guess I’m fucked now.”
5. Aggression “FUCK YOU!”
6. Disgust “Fuck me.”
7. Confusion “What the fuck…….?”
8. Difficulty “I don’t understand this fucking business!”
9. Despair “Fucked again…”
10. Pleasure “I fucking couldn’t be happier.”
11. Displeasure “What the fuck is going on here?”
12. Lost “Where the fuck are we.”
13. Disbelief “UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE!”
14. Retaliation “Up your fucking ass!”
15. Denial “I didn’t fucking do it.”
16. Perplexity “I know fuck all about it.”
17. Apathy “Who really gives a fuck, anyhow?”
18. Greetings “How the fuck are ya?”
19. Suspicion “Who the fuck are you?”
20. Panic “Let’s get the fuck out of here.”
21. Directions “Fuck off.”
22. Disbelief “How the fuck did you do that?”

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Alootechie on WordPress

I had written a couple of sentences on the code error display which Alootechie was plauged by ever since it’s launch – https://puchoo.wordpress.com/2007/08/09/alootechie-problem/

Comments from Rajesh and Daksh suggested a possible migration to the wordpress platform and i was glad to see that it finally happened yesterday.  Visit alootechie.com and the look and feel of WordPress is pretty evident , althout it looks a bit crowded now..?

Driving from Delhi to Shimla

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Update as of 20th April 2010

It took me no less than 7 hours to do the trip , and this is despite my best efforts to expedite as much as i could. Nevertheless it is not a bad time at all and once the current work gets carried out , i think 6.30 hours non stop will be achievable.

Coming to the update – the stretch between Ambala and Karnal is being widened and the digging is on full swing. The traffic flow is not disrupted too badly at this point with there being diversions 2-3 Kms spaced out. But it does result in slowing down substantially.

The toll booth at Karnal has been shifted a bit further down and is turning out to offer quite the competition to our Delhi – Gurgaon expressway , dont be surprised if it takes you 15-20 minutes to clear it depending on the time of day. Toll is now 78 INR one way.

The Ambala- Zirakpur stretch is absolutely lovely now. All that work has payed off and you can cross the stretch in about 30 minutes . There is a toll gate mid way.

Zirakpur – Kalka/Parwanoo is where major work is taking place right now and this stretch can eat up into your time substantially as it did with me. It took me only about 3 and a half hours to cross Zirakpur but almost another 1 hour just to start climbing. Road widening and building flyovers is whats taking place and the construction is on a pretty grand scale but once done , this particular stretch should be doable in about 20-25 minutes but i dont think there will be any relief from the jams at Parwaoo/Kalka etc since those roads remain the minuscule size they are currently.

Road condition to Shimla is overall good and does not warrant or demand slow driving. Lots of points and spots were being fixed and short of Timber Trail they are widening the road. The work currently stretches for only about 250 mts but this will probably get larger

Update as of 1st November 2009

I went home for Diwali and drove as usual. The update is that the Zirakpur stretch is pretty much over and done with. The amount of time saved because of the Panipat floyover and now Zirakpur is good. Ambala to Zirakpur can now be done between 30-40 minutes depending on the time of the day , faster probably depending on the car as well.

Zirakpur to Kalka is still a pain – the work continues , lots of diversions ,single lanes at places and then ofcourse the traditional jams at Parwanoo and Kalka. All the time time saved at Zirakpur gets wasted here – but the work is on. This time up total time taken was 7 .5 hours ( 30 minutes or so lost due to an accident before Panipat) and coming down it took a little under 7.

Update as on 24th June 2009

A delayed update , but briefly the Panipat bypass has been open for some months now as well as the one at Zirakpur. They bypass can easily save about 30 minutes of driving time depending on the time of the day. Good quality road , but unfortunately not very disciplined at keeping Trucks to a lane, Rikshaws off etc. So be careful.

The Zirakpur stretch is partly done but still a mess but the intitial flyover having been built saves time as well. Plus the road between Ambala and Chandgrah should be getting almost ready as well , which is going to save further time.

The stretch between Panchkula and Kalka was a pain when i went last about 2 months ago. Lot of digging to widending the road , so effectively all the time one saves at Panipat and Zirakpur can be nullified here , but again depends on the time of the day.

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I am continuously asked about tips/information on driving to Shimla by friends and acquaintances. I assumed hence that this information might be useful in general as well and hence decided to pen down some stuff.Lets talk of all the other things except finances first.TIME: If you are driving to Shimla for the first time then give yourself about 10 hours. Roughly broken up into 8 hours driving and about 2 hours of stops. When u leave Delhi can play a big role in how much time you take. I just went up recently in a Zen. Left at 4:30 in the morning and reached Shimla at 10:30…a straight 6 hours (a record even by my standards) with a half an hour stop for breakfast and another half an hour for tea. But getting out of Delhi can be a very time consuming process in itself. I went up again and left in fact at 330 but got caught in a jam and reached Shimla at 1130..so it affected my entire time by an hour.

ROAD: The over all road condition is pretty pretty good. I break it into 3 Segments. Primarily Delhi to Ambala , Ambala to Kalka and Kalka to Shimla. After u have left behind the normal bumps and potholes of Delhi roads u can sit back and cruise. Its an excellent road sometime 2 laned sometimes 4 all the way to Ambala. Ambala to Kalka is congested..its a single road with no divider (be careful while overtaking here) and lasts a

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